Following the birth of my sweet little cub, many people called, texted, and of course, posted on my facebook wall, words of congratulations and celebration. Yet, at the time, it was the words from other moms that struck me the most. They said things like, 'Welcome to the club' and 'Welcome to the mommyhood, you did it!' It was as though I'd just been granted acceptance into some type of exclusive group, this following a long and grueling initiation process. And now that I've been an active member in said group for almost 7 months, I have to admit that I really value the sometimes vocal but sometimes silent support that comes from other members of the club, moms who have walked a mile or two in my shoes.
Sometimes I feel that support in one simple glance, like the one I received from a woman who held the door open for me at the post office, as I attempted to push the stroller through the door, juggle the handful of packages that I needed to mail, and all the while lugging my 10lb purse overflowing with toys, hats, and a variety of other baby sundries. It was that look in her eyes that seemed to convey an assurance, like her eyes were saying, "it's ok, I know. I've been there, it can be tough. But I survived and they really do grow so fast. You're doing a good job, keep it up." And in that moment, with that one glance, I breathed a sigh of relief, my shoulders relaxed, and I was reminded that I'm not alone in this journey.
A couple of months ago, I walked into an early morning meeting looking rather bleary-eyed and one woman who happens also to be a mom took one look at me and asked, "rough night? How many times was he up?" That's all it took from one mom to another, just one glance at my weary face and she could immediately empathize with my sleepless plight. It's what I like to call 'mom-radery,' a form of comradery that assures me we're in this together and that we can learn from one another as well as support each other. I actually just got off the phone with my friend who recently had her second baby and well, let's just say that thus far, this one is a little tougher than the first one was. We commiserated for a while on how difficult and tiring it can be to have a baby who screams constantly, not to mention the sadness it brings us to watch such a little one struggle in angst to work out his or her business.
There is strength to be had and wisdom to be gained from each other, especially from those veteran members of the club. And this is not such an easy club to get into (well, the 'rushing' phase where you express your desire to get into the club is pretty fun and exciting, if you know what I mean!). Yet, after 9.5 months of hazing and 45 hours of initiation at the hospital, I can honestly say, "it was totally worth it." Not only is my little boy one of the greatest joys I've ever known, but I am also extremely grateful for the mom-radery that I've discovered amongst the members of this club, both friends and strangers! Yes, I very much like being part of this club, which is good because I hear that de-activation is not an option! Once a mom, always a mom!
Sometimes I feel that support in one simple glance, like the one I received from a woman who held the door open for me at the post office, as I attempted to push the stroller through the door, juggle the handful of packages that I needed to mail, and all the while lugging my 10lb purse overflowing with toys, hats, and a variety of other baby sundries. It was that look in her eyes that seemed to convey an assurance, like her eyes were saying, "it's ok, I know. I've been there, it can be tough. But I survived and they really do grow so fast. You're doing a good job, keep it up." And in that moment, with that one glance, I breathed a sigh of relief, my shoulders relaxed, and I was reminded that I'm not alone in this journey.A couple of months ago, I walked into an early morning meeting looking rather bleary-eyed and one woman who happens also to be a mom took one look at me and asked, "rough night? How many times was he up?" That's all it took from one mom to another, just one glance at my weary face and she could immediately empathize with my sleepless plight. It's what I like to call 'mom-radery,' a form of comradery that assures me we're in this together and that we can learn from one another as well as support each other. I actually just got off the phone with my friend who recently had her second baby and well, let's just say that thus far, this one is a little tougher than the first one was. We commiserated for a while on how difficult and tiring it can be to have a baby who screams constantly, not to mention the sadness it brings us to watch such a little one struggle in angst to work out his or her business.
There is strength to be had and wisdom to be gained from each other, especially from those veteran members of the club. And this is not such an easy club to get into (well, the 'rushing' phase where you express your desire to get into the club is pretty fun and exciting, if you know what I mean!). Yet, after 9.5 months of hazing and 45 hours of initiation at the hospital, I can honestly say, "it was totally worth it." Not only is my little boy one of the greatest joys I've ever known, but I am also extremely grateful for the mom-radery that I've discovered amongst the members of this club, both friends and strangers! Yes, I very much like being part of this club, which is good because I hear that de-activation is not an option! Once a mom, always a mom!
Beautifully said. It's funny, on J's first birthday, I felt in a way that it was my birthday too. I had actually managed to keep this little guy alive and flourishing for 1 year. Thanks be to God! (and I've talked to other mamas who feel the same way).
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